Lesson 101: How NOT To Be A Dick To Your Friends

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It’s pretty simply really, not being a dick to your friends that is. So why is it that so many struggle with the rhetoric? Supporting your friends is actually pretty easy. It requires um, support and an attitude that screams “I’m a good friend, believe me”.

Now, I’ve seen many people burned when they feel that their closest compadres are not by their side to help them promote their brands, events or even read their written work – I may be specifically addressing myself with the latter. It’s a tough road to embark on and frankly, there’s no easy way to say “mate, your friend is being a total dick”. Sure, support in your ventures isn’t something that you’re supposed to do when your friends begin on a new journey, but if you care for them and value their ideas…. why the fuck not? It’s a strange ideal to me personally, because I’ve always seen myself as someone who advises and then supports their closests to the endth degree. I mean, I’d like to think it’s one of my better qualities but in truth, it’s probably one of my greater flaws. You see, all too often do I promote, tweet about, Facebook status and Instagram many people’s accomplishments, but rarely do I receive the same enthusiasm in return. But perhaps that’s my own naivety?

I recently cut someone off dead at the foot – like that of the first Saw film – when I realised that they were never going to support neither myself, nor my growth and accomplishments. Having exhausted all my resources for a brand I cared little for, it was surely a relief and a release that I’d let this cause go. This individual in question was, and probably still is, so wrapped up in their own delusion they didn’t realise that they actually kind of need a support system to build, but hey. Though it may read as though I’m trying to throw this inane person under the bus, that isn’t the case. It was simply the Kylie Jenner “realizing stuff” moment for me. The moment that broke the camels back and the doorway of reality I head-bucked on my way out without looking. In a sense I’m pretty glad that I got to experience that dickheaded behaviour because it allowed me to readjust and refocus my energy on friends – and the projects – that really mattered. It was my wake up call if you will.

You see, it’s difficult to expect support if you’re not willing to give it in return. In fact, it’s not only difficult but exhausting and especially in self indulged persons, who see only their vision as the only vision. As aforementioned, I understand wholeheartedly that this isn’t a give to receive act, but in giving support to your good friends, it’s sort of like… well why wouldn’t you want to return the favour? It makes all the sense in the world to want to return the fuel these individuals give you, to keep on going. No? I mean, correct me if I’m wrong because of course I don’t have all of the answers. Again, perhaps that’s where my naivety comes into play.

It’s like this, if you just so happen to get a glimpse of someone’s idea coming to life, hit a like button, retweet a tweet, scream it from the fucking rooftops. But do not, DO NOT keep quiet until it’s too late, because soon enough they’ll be flying to parties in their private jets and leaving on yachts while you sip your 10 dollar cocktail, telling people that “your friend” created a really awesome brand.

Follow Lauren on Twitter @lawrenrae_
(Illustration by @drawnbymary)